(Via bilerico,) Bruce Hetrick’s satirical look at SJR 7 in the Indianapolis Business Journal:
Hi. Big Brother here. You know me: Mr. Government-Knows-Best,
Mr. Run-Your-Life-For-You,
Mr. Tell-You-What-You-Can-and-Cannot-Do.
I realize I’m not popular in these Hoosier parts. I know I’ve failed to mandate the use of motorcycle helmets. Failed to mandate the use of safety belts in trucks. Failed to stop you from smoking up that old Chevy Malibu with your little munchkin ridin’ shotgun.
Granted, after decades of futility, I finally conned you into daylight-saving time. But that was an aberration. And you’re not happy about it. And a huge percentage of you opted out, anyway.
More typical of your Hoosier resistance to regulation: You have the second-highest smoking rate in the nation and the heart disease, cancer and death rate to show for it. But you won’t even consider joining Arizona, California, Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, the District of Columbia, Florida, Hawaii, Idaho, Louisiana, Maine, Massachusetts, Montana, Nevada, New Jersey, New York, Ohio, Rhode Island, Utah, Vermont and Washington in passing a statewide smoke-free workplace law.
But there is one issue where you love me, baby. One topic where even you government-be-damned, you’re-not-the-bossof-me Hoosier masses crave Big Brother’s meddling.On that issue, you dig discrimination. You clamor to keep folks different from you quietly closeted.
Hypocritical as it may seem, all you members of the none-of-your-business, anti-bureaucracy crowd beg me to regulate the lives and loves of one infinitesimal subset of humanity.
And it’s not the rapists. Not the spouseabusers. Not the sex offenders. Not the child-molesters. Not the deadbeat parents. Not the polluters. Not the puppy-killers. Not the murderers, muggers, drunks or thieves.
Nope, the ones you want me to rein in are men who have sex with men and women who have sex with women. For when it comes to this horrible, terrible, devious, dangerous threat to humanity and the planet, you love to have Big Brother dictate who can love whom, and under what circumstances and whether we even speak of such salaciousness.
I think this does illustrate a fault line in the Republican coalition we’ve seen over the past couple of decades. Pro-business interests tend to desire a weak government that doesn’t do much except help enforce contracts and keep the market stable and safe enough to allow business as usual to be conducted. Social conservatives seem to envision a stronger, more intrusive government, at least in certain areas like, for example, gay marriage, rights (or lack thereof) for unmarried couples, abortion, religion in schools, etc.
The bad year at the polls in 2006 might put a little more stress on the fault line. A bad year in 2008, and maybe we’ll be looking at a seismic shift.