So, today is a day for reflecting on the significance of fatherhood. Which I will do by ignoring my kids while I write a blog post. Perhaps I’ve already failed!
The experience has certainly changed me. I don’t think any other experience would have been sufficient to mature me from adolescent into adult. I mean, I was already chronologically an adult well before having children, but my mental space was less serious, less focused, and too self-centered to really be considered adult.
Fatherhood is about sacrifice and leadership: sacrificing your own immediate self-interests for others; and considering their well-being such that you can lead them into a happy life of their own. Of course, long-term, this seems to be more rewarding to my own self-interest than if I had not become a father. (Not least of all because I got a Fry Daddy for Father’s Day!)
Thinking about it, I’d go beyond the family, and suggest that developing these qualities of sacrifice and leadership are beneficial to the health of the community at large. I look around Tippecanoe County and see that it is a thriving community in no small part because of those men I know (women too – but this is Father’s Day) who spend their time, energy, and money on projects that help the community even without being immediately beneficial to the particular individual.
And, again, these efforts have a tendency to provide long term rewards to the individual who finds himself with a fuller and more balanced sense of self coupled with, not incidentally, a better place to live; whether that better place is a vibrant, active household or a vibrant, active community or – ideally – both.