It’s been a rough month for Richmond kids I went to school with. Today, I found out that Cari (Spitz) Ashford, a 1991 graduate of RHS, died of cancer this past Tuesday. This comes on the heels of the death of Tony Feller (RHS Class of ’90) about eight days earlier.
Again, Cari wasn’t someone with whom I was close. I hadn’t spoken with her for about 15 years. Mostly I remember her as a sweet girl from high school I worked with on the high school paper and took to a dance once. But, even as distant as these two are from my current circle of acquaintances, their deaths in rapid succession have the power to make me angry. Both were fine people with a lot to offer the world. Times like these, I tend to think that there seem to be a lot of people without so much to offer who are in fine health. So, alert the media: “Life is not fair.”
My temper has cooled about that fact, but it’s not entirely gone. I remember when I was 19, a friend of my sister died in a motorcycle accident. I remember seething when I came across this one real piece of shit guy who worked with me in the warehouse that summer. It seemed abominable to me that this guy was drawing breath while my friend was being buried at age 21 or 22. Age has a way of numbing you to life’s inequities.
Just one more reminder to hug my family and recall that, such problems as I may have are pretty insignificant. Rest in peace, Cari, and strength to your family.
Truly sad news. Those of us at this age are really just hitting our strides, having kids, settling into the routine that we’ll be in for the next many years. And yet at the same time these two people have been having to confront their own mortality for years, prepare their children, and leave knowing that they really only saw the beginning and that the rest will have to proceed after their untimely departures. Their (and their families’) courage and grace have been inspiring. It’s just tragic and unfair, and not the way it’s supposed to be.